...because they are freaking terrifying.
Anything that can make a rhino turn tail and run is bad news.
Not impressed? Check out this hippo relentlessly thrashing a large male crocodile.
I won't post the video of a hippo basically biting off a lioness' head, because ew. I will, however, provide a link for the curious.
Hippos are regarded as one of the most aggressive animals in Africa. They also apparently hate humans, as they've been known to attack fairly regularly and without provocation. In a land of crocodiles, lions, and rock pythons, the locals consider hippos to be the most dangerous creature. Let that sink in for a minute.
I found a website that offered some tips of how to avoid a hippo attack. They all pretty much boiled down to "stay away from hippos." My favorite tip said that "Yelling and waving your arms won't do much good against a rampaging hippo." Ya think???
Now, LONG-time readers of this blog will know I've been trying to warn the world for years about the eventual Humboldt squid war on mankind. However, now I'm a little frightened that hippos may beat them to the punch. They've already got the advantage in that they can travel and attack by both land and sea. (Well, rivers, anyway)
FOMW Nightmare Fodder of the Week: the dreaded Humboldt Hippo!
I need a happy thought after that: